Song of the Week: Crooked Vulture

Crooked Vulture was one of the first Skinner Brothers songs I heard after being introduced to Prawn Soup back in 2024. It still seems wild to me knowing that this song is less than two years old! I swear the Skinner Brothers have some sort of time warp going on around them, where songs like this feel much older than they actually are, and we all just kind of go along with it for the plot. Either that, or I just listen to their music so frequently that it has fundamentally altered my own perception of linear time, but that's much less interesting than the time warp thing.

It's kind of like when you look back on a specific song from your playlist, and you can't quite remember a time when it wasn't there, but then you realize it was just released a half hour ago. Maybe it just feels that way in this case because Crooked Vulture shares the iconic “Bella-ella-aye” line with Rhianna's song Umbrella, which was released almost 20 years ago now (feel old yet?).

The major difference between the Skinner Brothers music and Rhianna's is that I like the Skinner Brothers. Yeah, yeah.. I saw that look. All formal grievances must be submitted in writing to our Complaint Department.

As I'm sure is true for many of you, I have discovered several excellent artists through Skinner Brothers collaborations, and Crooked Vulture was no exception. Prior to hearing this song, I had never heard of JyellowL or Holocene, and of the two, Holocene was a lot more difficult to track down. I think I found them, but I'm not sure, so I'm just going to ask for forgiveness here instead of tagging a random band that may or may not have any idea what I'm talking about if they happened to stumble upon this article. Holocene, if you do see this, drop us a message and I'll be happy to explore your music further and give you guys a proper write up!

JyellowL, on the other hand, was much easier to find. With songs like Ozone being featured on the FIFA soundtrack in 2020, and Ladies Night bringing the heat with a little reggae twist, he seems like another artist that will not fit neatly inside a box. I absolutely love his verse on Crooked Vulture, and his voice compliments Zac's perfectly. The verse adds an extra layer of emotional depth to a tune that already felt like it was treading the water between heartbreak and ecstasy. JyellowL was a perfect fit for this track, and I'm looking forward to hearing more from him in the future!

I consider you my only option, with you in the hospital, with you in the coffin

Crooked Vulture is the musical equivalent of dry ice— it’s living proof that something can be hot and very, very cold at the exact same time. That line from JyellowL's verse is easily one of my top ten favorite quotes from any Skinner Brothers song for that exact reason. And as far as the chorus goes, the polar shift between referring to someone as a 'crooked vulture' and then calling them “my bella” in the same breath is enough to give you whiplash. It's like taking a toxic relationship and turning it into a Broadway musical, where you love your partner unconditionally in the first act, and then by the second you're reminded of everything that person has ever done to make you hate them.

When the lights come on and the music stops, my smile fades and the depression locks

I suppose on the other hand, this song doesn't necessarily have to be about another person at all—the lyrics could just as easily be describing someone's tumultuous relationship with alcohol. Everyone is happy when the drinks are flowing and the party's rocking, but all good things must eventually come to an end. When the lights get turned on and 'closing time' is no longer a polite suggestion, reality is the taxicab that will always be bringing you home. Or maybe that's just the hangover talking, who knows? I'm not a psychiatrist.

As an American, though, one of my favorite things about analyzing Skinner Brothers lyrics is when I occasionally have to Google UK slang. Thankfully this is happening less frequently now, as I'm starting to get a handle on what you little devils are up to over there. But on the rare occasion that I do have to lean on Google for support, there's usually a brief AI overview explaining in great detail why 'salmon' (in this case) is most likely referring to a cigarette instead of a handful of other less likely possibilities.

But for every simple (and wholesome) definition you're able to locate quickly on the internet, Urban Dictionary comes staggering through the door with a Marlboro Red hanging from its lips saying, “Hold my moonshine.” No, I am not going to elaborate on that any further. I have provided the resources, you are on your own for the clicking, young Padawan.

Talk shit down my phone now I feel so low

This line really hits home for me, as someone who will carry a grudge with me to the grave on the off chance I'll be allowed to bring it with me to the afterlife.

Come on now, you know the feeling—someone has said or done something wrong to you, and now they're just sitting there with that stupid look on their face, begging to have their chakras realigned. You've been biting your tongue for as long as humanly possible, but eventually you reach a tipping point and end up going off like Vesuvius. You lay into them with everything you have, poison spilling forth like red wine on a brand new carpet. Then, to your immediate satisfaction, you leave them standing there in a stunned silence, mouth agape... But then what?

You would think that you would feel an immediate sense of relief, as if a giant weight had been lifted off of your chest, but that's never the case, is it? Because it doesn't matter how right you were, or how dumb they are— somehow, against all rational logic, lashing out like that actually ends up making you feel worse. Like you just kicked a helpless puppy for falsely believing that the world is its toilet. And that, my friends, is why life is hard.

I feel like I'm living in a movie, directed my Spielberg played by Clooney

Okay folks, here it is. The ultimate question: Who would YOU cast to play Zac in a movie about his life? Believe it or not, I had already drafted an answer to this question in a different Song of the Week article, but after writing it all out, I ended up deleting it. Mostly because it was completely unrelated to the song I was writing about at the time (sound familiar?), but this time, with THESE lyrics?! Come on, it's fate! So while I have you here, let me tell you why it has to be Bobcat Goldthwait...

Is it the long hair? The leather jacket? Being voted 'most likely to become a sniper'? The short answer is yes. (I don't want to listen to Bobcat sing, though, so there's that. That's nightmare fuel.)

While it's true that a young Val Kilmer (or Jim Morrison!) would be much better suited for the role, that's way too easy considering they are practically twins. Bobcat has the quick wit, quirky sense of humor, and patient intellect that says “I know more than you, but I'm going to wait for you to figure that out on your own.”

Plus, if you've been following along with the Skinner Brothers Patreon content, I think it's safe to say that Zac could have a lucrative career in comedy if he ever got bored with music. But let's not give him any ideas, at least not until after Soul Boy VI comes out, what do you say?

☘️🖤

Lyrics from YouTube:
I get the feeling I was smoking and I missed her
I pull a drag on this salmon not a bifta
and then my hand swing back it crack bone crack jaws
then I wake up wherever I do

I feel like I'm living in a movie
directed by Spielberg played by Clooney
Fuck that, I'm gonna let her use me
Talk shit on my phone now I feel so low
But when the lights come on and the music stops
my smile fades and then depression locks

But then she go acapella
crooked vulture my Bella-ella-aye
Then she go acapella
crooked vulture my Bella-ella-aye

I said it once, said it twice, said it thrice times
waking up in the morning with them black eyes
'coz everywhere I go turns to blows
either way, it's a win-win though

FEMALE VOX
When she sings I feel okay
2 by Tuesday, and 12 per day

JYELLOWL VERSE
I was of pocket when I saw you in those trousers
Tryna get your chocolate without saying something childish
Let me hold the umbrella for you while you're walking
I think I’m in love with her, I think I’m love with her
And you know consider you my only option
With you in a hospital with you in the coffin
Didn’t meet on the web, but the web is what I’m caught in
I wanna get lost with ya
Then again